The talk

Today I had 'The Talk' with my boyfriend. Though, it was quite a useless talk, for all he did was compare me with one of his ex-girlfriends. He complained about me and I pretended to listen. He said that he thought I was being to selfish - to narcissistic and to demanding in this relation. Wow, I took a blow at my self-esteem. For a first time, I got my feelings hurt by someone I pretend to love, (we say that we love each other, but I doubt even my own feelings towards him.) and still stay with him. 


Well I got a few blows below the belt in, I hope. I told him that he needed to spend more time in this relationships, if he wanted to continue it. But still I doubt it all. Maybe I am better of alone. Like the song Tallulah from Sonata Arctica. 

Tallulah, It's easier to live alone than fear the time it's over, oo-ooh...
Tallulah, find the words and talk to me, oh, Tallulah,
This could be... heaven 

This is the now and in the now, I don't feel like I want to be alone. I want to feel loved - or at least wanted. 

Love,


Aledawn 


P.s. try to listen to the song Tallulah - it made me think about my past relationship and the band Sonata Arctica is really good.


P.p.s. Happy Fathers day for all the fathers in the world. Please remember, your children are really important.

Sunday - boring sunday

So today is a sunday. I disliked sundays allot. But at this point I can see the pro's of a quite sunday. All the stores are closed here at this point and there is nothing much to do then watch some television or read a good book. Cleaning the house (well that might me forced) and making a good diner. Also, today is fathersday. But I visited my dad yesterday. All and all this will be a silent good sunday. The first sunday I am totally alone (exept the dog) which is nice. And i'm currently going to listen to the 9th audiobook of the Sookie Stackhouse novels. "Dead and Gone" thought i'd give it some credit. Charlaine, may you ever read this, good work girl! I have enjoyed every Sookie novel there is (Well exept the 9th and 10th and the ones that have not been published jet. Because I did not read/listen to it yet.) This includeds my message for my boring sunday.

Mood: Happy, Broken, Bored
Currentaudiobook: Sookie Stackhouse Novels - Dead and Gone by Charlaine Harris.


Bye - for now,

Aledawn

p.s.

For all the fathers out there who where good for their children;

Happy Fathersday - You decerive one.